L'amore
by The 2786 Project
Summary: They rode the train every day, just him and her. She should've seen it coming. AU
1. Chapter 1

L'amore

Katekyo Hitman Reborn! Fanfic

Pairing: 2786 (TsunaHaru)

Description: They rode the train every day, just him and her. She should've seen it coming. AU

* * *

><p>When she first met him through their mutual friend, she came up with three conclusions. One. He wasn't hot or handsome. He was just…kind of cute in her opinion. He was cute, but his face had a sort of ordinary feel to it. Two. She wanted to see his smile. He looked so awkward, surrounded by all the girls around him. She wanted to see an expression that would light up his face. Three. For some reason, she desperately, truly wanted to be his friend.<p>

So gathering up her courage, she brashly went in front of him with a huge smile on her face. "Hi there! I'm Miura Haru. What's your name?" He looked a bit…confused when she addressed him in such a friendly manner. "My name's Sawada Tsunayoshi." The light in Haru's eyes brightened and her smile stretched wider.

"Let's be friends, okay?"

Now he looked _very _startled, but that was okay. She had taken to the first step. Now it was only up to the heavens to determine if friendship would blossom or not. So as she walked away with a bounce to her every step, her fate was already being written out.

If only she knew what lied ahead of her…

* * *

><p>The very next day in geometry class, Haru discovered that Sawada Tsunayoshi was in the same class as her. He didn't seem to notice her, so she didn't say anything. If she did, her teacher would've murdered her right there anyways.<p>

* * *

><p>Her mouth opened until it took on the shape of a small o. It was him! As he turned around, she quickly spun the other way so he wouldn't see her face. Her mind jumped to thousands of conclusions and endless questions. Why was he here? Was he meeting someone? Did he perhaps live near her? Did he also ride the same train as she did? Haru's feet tapped mindlessly to the music playing in her head through her headphones as she boarded her train.<p>

He rode the same train as her. Go figure.

She didn't dare do anything; especially since he was with his friend. Wouldn't it be rude if she jumped in front of them and started blabbering away? Not only would it be rude, but also embarrassing. So she stayed in her corner of the train, watching Sawada Tsunayoshi and his companion out of the corner of her eye from time to time. His friend's hair was unique; it was silver, almost gray in fact. She sort of knew the tall boy; he was in the same language class as her. So when they got off two stops before her final destination, she resolved to become friends with both of them.

* * *

><p>Haru winced and cupped one hand to her eye. Her vision was getting awfully blurry…she couldn't see anything. Was it because of the incident that had happened during her first year or middle school? She almost winced again, recalling that terrible memory when the metal had thudded on her eye. After a while, her vision cleared. It was no longer as blurry as before, but it was not clear. She could see, but it was all hazy. So she prayed to the heavens to have mercy on her. She earnestly wished in her heart for three things; friends, good grades and better eyesight. But she couldn't help but feel it was selfish of her to ask such things.<p>

* * *

><p>Haru smiled earnestly at Sawada Tsunayoshi. She couldn't help it, she always wanted to smile. She had heard from her father that smiles were contagious, that they easily spread. So she always smiled, hoping that one of these days, Sawada Tsunayoshi would return back a tiny smile at least.<p>

"Sawada Tsunayoshi-san, do you have a lot of homework?"

"I probably do."

And thus, Haru couldn't help but feel disappointment strike at her heart. Their conversations on the train were always so strained, so awkward that she wanted to run away and cry. Why couldn't he respond to her better? Why couldn't he be more outgoing with her like the way he was with his friends? Was it because she was a girl? Was it because she was so painfully loud and annoying?

And so…the train went on as the two youngsters fell into silence, the poor girl feeling troubled in her mind and heart.

* * *

><p>"Sawada Tsunayoshi-san, do you play any games?"<p>

His eyes seemed to lighten up, just a little bit, Haru noted. "Yeah, I do." Haru smiled. "I do. Do you know what game I play? I play this game, Maplestory- have you heard of it? It's really fun and people don't say that it's any fun at all nowadays but I still think-"

Sawada Tsunayoshi was quiet once again.

Haru's heart sank. So were their conversations just going to end up like this again? Were they just going to stand there in awkward silence until she rambled away again? "It is an old game… I didn't know anyone else in this school played the game." Haru's heart lifted.

Finally! He had responded; he had actually talked back to her!

"What world do you play in?" She asked. And thus, they spent the rest of the train ride talking about the ups and downs of the game. And Haru couldn't help but feel a little orb of happiness bubble in her heart as she coaxed answers out of him. _One step at a time, _she thought to herself after Sawada Tsunayoshi was long gone. _I can't scare him away, I need-no, I want him to show himself! _

Haru really had no idea why she was trying so hard. What was so special about this person anyways? And after a few seconds, she realized yet again that she had no idea at all.

* * *

><p>"I was thinking about joining the math team."<p>

Haru's eyes widened. He…Sawada Tsunayoshi…was…was he really talking to her first? He had, hadn't he? She hadn't said anything and yet he had talked to her first! "You're joining the math team…?" Her voice trailed off. Tsuna nodded. He looked excited at the idea, he looked _alive _and oh so young that Haru didn't mind at all that he was joining the math team.

"Believe it or not, I'm pretty good at math even though I'm terrible at all my other subjects." Haru's eyes widened. "Then-could you please tutor me?" She begged. She needed it; she sat all the way at the back during math class and her right eye was still hindering her vision so it was really very hard for her to learn anything at all. His mouth curved downwards.

"I can't teach."

"Please? Pretty, pretty please? I'm begging you!" And despite all her pleas, he would not budge an inch. So she gave up. "If you join the math team then won't you have to stay afterschool?" She realized this and it felt like a hammer was panging away at her heart. Sawada Tsunayoshi nodded. "Yeah, on Wednesdays. The first meet is this Wednesday, actually."

"I…see."

She bit back words that threatened to spill from her mouth. She didn't want that, she didn't want it at all. It was ridiculous, considering the fact that she saw him on Tuesdays and Thursdays during her lunch period, and during math class every single day as well. But the times they spent riding the train together was **special **to her, it was a daily routine that hadn't been broken once. Sawada Tsunayoshi's friend no longer rode the train with him, so it was just him and her.

Suddenly a thought bloomed in her mind, like the way a flower would suddenly bloom in spring.

"Sawada Tsunayoshi-san, do you hate me?"

The boy looked at her and Haru felt her frame quivering a bit. _Please say that you don't hate me, please, please…_

It seemed like ten years were passing in the seconds that ticked by as she waited for him to answer. "I…don't." Haru felt she could do _anything. _"You don't? You really don't?" He shook his head and Haru let out a squeal of happiness.

And then she _hugged _him.

Immediately, he went stiff in her arms, stiff as plywood. Her arms, still wrapped around his neck, loosened and then went back to her sides. "I-I'm sorry. I'm just really glad that you don't hate me." He nodded slowly at this and Haru exhaled a long sigh of relief.

"You shouldn't call me Sawada Tsunayoshi-san, you know. It's a mouthful. Just call me Tsuna. Everybody does. You're the only one out of all the people I know that calls me that. So just call me Tsuna. Alright?" Haru's mouth widened and a tiny smile formed on her face.

_We're close; we're so much closer now…_

"Alright, then I'll call you Tsuna-san!" …. "Sure. Why not?"

* * *

><p>Haru felt that she had never felt so lonely in her life before. She now no longer ate in the lunchroom as she had no one to talk to or sit with, so she sat in the library instead. All of her friends seemed to be drifting apart, becoming cold towards her. Her grades were terrible and her eyesight was deteriorating at an even faster rate now. Since when had she become so lonely? Since when had she become all alone? Why? Even though she had prayed so earnestly…Even though she had hoped fervently that this wouldn't happen…<p>

It had happened anyways.

Haru sighed. Ever since Tsuna-san had started going to math team, she saw less and less of him. She could barely see him; even in math class since all her attention was directed towards the board. So as she boarded the train, feeling helplessly alone, she prayed to the heavens to take mercy on her. She prayed for good grades, she prayed for good friends, she prayed for someone to notice this wish of hers.

* * *

><p>Haru shook a little bit as she trudged home in the dark. Her bag felt heavy on her shoulders, her body felt like it was going to drop from exhaustion. Her mind…it didn't feel like her mind anymore. Money, Haru decided as she paused to look at the inky black sigh, was terrible. It made people selfish, it hurt them, and it ripped apart their souls until there was nothing left except a working machine.<p>

She hated it. Because of it, because of _her, _her parents had to work twice as hard now. She rarely saw her mother because she didn't come into the house till eleven in the evening and left the house for work at six in the morning. Her father's forehead would crease every time he went over the bills. And now that she was older with a need of money for public transportation and such, their money seemed to slip right through the fingertips and into someone else's eagerly waiting hand. Haru sighed. Surely…Surely this was only a phase of life she'd get over. _There's always tomorrow, _she whispered to her mind. _Let's try to hang on until then. _

* * *

><p>"Tsuna-san!"<p>

Her voice squeaked and she launched herself at the boy. Her arms wrapped around his neck and she reveled in his warmth, in his scent. He never responded back; he never tried to return her hugs. But that was okay. That was alright. After a long two weeks, she was finally able to see him again. After remembering herself and where she was, she hastily let go of him and giggled nervously. And then she waved goodbye and ran down the hallway.

Later on that day, Haru and Tsuna boarded their train. It was as if nothing had changed; Haru's head moved to the music once in a while and Tsuna fiddled with the lock on his bag now and then. "You know what, Tsuna-san?"

"What?"

"I missed you." The words were blurted out, and Haru fought to push back the shades of pink that threatened to bloom on her cheeks. "You know, since I didn't see you for a long time," she added hastily. After a moment's hesitation, she spoke again. "Did you miss me?"

"No." But his answer came out softly. Haru didn't seem to notice it though. Her mind and very being were sinking at his words. So…he hadn't missed her? He hadn't missed her the way she had missed him? He hadn't felt lonely, not even once? But she pushed away those complicated thoughts. What mattered was that Tsuna-san was here and they were together again on the train. Just him and her. Two adolescents.

* * *

><p>A thought formed in her head. It was sudden and unexpected; it had come without a warning. <em>Do…Do I like Tsuna-san? <em>_**That **__way? _Immediately, she shook her head. No way. She couldn't. She wouldn't. It was wrong. It would taint the friendship she had worked so hard for. She remembered the day when she had asked him about relationships and such. His mouth had tightened and he looked a smidgen awkward. "Love is…Love is bullshit."

Haru reached out and patted his cheek. "Don't think like that," she whispered. "Love isn't always like that." And then she had rambled about how she wasn't going to date anyone until she was sixteen. And then **he **had said that he wouldn't date anyone till the age of eighteen; he wouldn't even look at a girl until that time.

Tsuna had said that he had absolutely no time for it anyways. And without knowing it, Haru had accidently stored that memory into her mind and engraved it onto her heart.

Haru heaved a sigh. Tsuna-san was at another math team meeting, so he wasn't here with her. Because he was not there, she was able to embrace the more philosophical aspect of her mind and wrestled with questions that most people did not consider to even think about. Haru's fists tightened.

She would not, she would not, and she would _not look _at him that way. She could not. She would not. It was forbidden, wasn't it? She had sworn to herself at least three or four years ago that she would never look at another boy till the age of sixteen, when she would be older and thus more mature. Haru mindlessly a stray lock behind her ear. Oh well. It was just a crush; it would come and fade away like most crushes.

* * *

><p>"You like Tsuna, don't you?"<p>

Haru nearly jumped out of her skin when that masculine voice entered her hearing. "Yamamoto-san, you scared me!" Yamamoto easily towered over her with his tall height and he chuckled, an apologetic smile on his face.

"But you do, don't you?"

Haru froze. Did she? No, she had decided a few days back that she did _not _like Tsuna that way. "I-Of course I don't!" She spluttered, turning red. Since when had it seemed so hot in the classroom? "Are you sure?" He said carefully. Haru tossed her hair out of her face and raised her head high. "Of course not," she replied in a smoother voice. "I don't like Tsuna-san that way at all."

Yamamoto shrugged. "If you say so…" He walked off, arms swinging every two steps he took. Haru felt pity for the boy. He was so nice, so athletic and so desirable among most of the female population of the school. Yet, he had his eyes on only one girl. It was Sasagawa Kyoko, one of the prettiest and nicest girls Haru had ever met. Kyoko did not know that Yamamoto would wait at least two hours for her, she did not know how much he really, really liked her.

It was very strange, really. So Haru made a quick prayer there. She prayed for Yamamoto's feelings to be reciprocated one day. But she was sure that Kyoko did snub the boy sometimes and Haru felt that such a sincere boy like Yamamoto who meant every word or action of love was supposed to end up with someone who could reciprocate those feelings.

Someone who would not snub him.

* * *

><p>Haru's mind felt strained, her back felt like it was going to break any second from all the weight she was shouldering from her backpack. She had been waiting two hours for Tsuna since the moment she had gotten onto their station. But she did not board any of the passing trains, even though they beckoned to her and whispered and pleaded with her to go home and relax. She wanted to see his face; she wanted to hear his voice so much. He made her always smile. Haru sighed. <em>Tsuna-san doesn't have club on Tuesdays so why isn't he coming…?<em>

Haru had spent the last two hours in an exceedingly excruciating manner. She had debated whether she should leave or not. Every now and then, her body and mind would tell her to go, to just **leave **and get the rest she deserved and needed. Haru breathed out a long sigh when she saw the familiar train making its' way into the station. Then a scream. A shout. Haru let out a yelp when something thumped her hard on the back and whirled around.

It was **him.**

With a girl.

And not just any girl; _it was Kyoko-chan!_

Haru swallowed thickly, trying to breathe. IT was as if someone had knocked out the wind out of her. "Hi, Haru-chan! What are you doing here so late? It's almost five-thirty you know." Haru did her best to put on a smile. "Kyoko-chan, hi! Well…I got out of school late for tutoring and stuff, you know. I got here about five minutes ago but the train wouldn't come, you know?"

Tsuna looked at her, not quite buying her explanation. "Didn't I see you leave the school earlier?" He queried. Haru waved a hand. "I did, I had to get something from a store. And then I went back in." He accepted this, and Haru felt a small sense of relief as the trio stepped onto the train. But to be honest, Haru was in fact very jealous. When she had first seen Tsuna and Kyoko, Kyoko was still smiling as always. But Tsuna…

He had been smiling. Laughing even. And what really made Haru feel jealous was how easily Kyoko was able to make Tsuna smile when it was excruciatingly hard for Haru to even get a tiny smile out of him. "So why are you guys out so late? Tsuna-san, you don't have club today right?"

Tsuna shrugged. "I went to the math club for a change. Turns out Kyoko-chan was also in the math club. And then after club we went to the café down the street. Why you ask?" Haru winked. "You can't blame a girl for being curious!" She chirped, desperately trying to hide how twisted she felt inside.

* * *

><p>"Oi. Miura."<p>

Haru looked up from her class notes, surprised to see Gokudera's face looking right at her. Gokudera was the boy who had once rode the train with Tsuna, but he didn't anymore for some reason. Gokudera and Haru didn't really…talk much even though they were in the same Japanese class.

"You know what?" He asked suddenly. "What is it?" She replied, absent-mindedly looking at the given work by the substitute teacher. Their Japanese teacher was absent for some reason, but she had left behind some work. Haru wanted Gokudera to hurry up and say what he had to say so she could go back to work. A thought struck her mind.

Why was Gokudera even talking to her?

"You know…I think he likes you."

Haru's heart lurched a little and her insides felt like they were being slowly twisted. Not in a bad way, though. A good sort of twisting way. "W-Who are you talking about?" She said, trying to keep her voice steady. Gokudera frowned. "You know who I'm talking about. Juudaime-Tsuna-he likes you, I think." Haru's mouth opened and closed but no words were able to get out.

And then she found her voice. "That's impossible," she said flatly. She wasn't going to get pulled into that again. "He doesn't like me that way." Gokudera's eyes narrowed, not because he was mad, but because he was thinking deeply. "I think he does. Whenever we see you in the morning, Tsuna always points you out. He goes, 'There's Haru!' but never goes up to you. Plus he takes more notice of you than any other gi-"

"It's never going to happen," Haru interrupted; her voice a tad bit harsher than she liked it to be. "Because he's never going to look at me that way." There was a pause of silence. Then… "Gokudera-san, why do you call him Juudaime?"

"Because he is." Was Gokudera's abrupt answer. Haru shrugged and went back to her work. But again, without knowing it, her heart was storing that memory into her heart. Did she dare admit it? Maybe…Maybe she did want him to look at her. Maybe…just maybe…Haru's head bowed while she worked away.

…Maybe she did want to look at Tsuna-san in a different light.

* * *

><p>"You know what, Tsuna-san? Gokudera-san said something incredibly strange to me. And I really want to tell you but I can't!" Tsuna looked up at her, head tilting a bit. "He said something? What is it?" Haru opened her mouth, but immediately it clamped shut.<p>

She didn't want to tell him such embarrassing words. What if it expanded the slowly closing distance between them? No…she would keep it to herself for now. "I-I can't tell you. B-But I really do want to tell you!" She wailed. Tsuna sighed.

"By the way, Tsuna-san…You're not…I mean…You don't swing _that _way, do you?"

Tsuna's eyes furrowed and an embarrassed look appeared on his face while a disgusted expression appeared in his eyes. "Do-Do I look gay?" Haru flinched. "No-I was just wondering. You never know, you know?"

But Tsuna's face was becoming blank again. Haru felt as if the ground below her feet had just collapsed, as if she was slowly falling. She had done it herself; without even telling him the embarrassing conversation.

"I think…I probably should stay away from you." He said at last, a creeped out look on his face. And Haru's world felt like it was going to collapse as he moved away from her, as he boarded a different car.

* * *

><p>"I think I should die."<p>

Tsuna's head snapped up. "What?" He asked in belief. Haru sighed. "I feel like I should die-rather, I don't think I should've been born at all." Tsuna looked at her, puzzled. "Why? He asked quietly.

"Well…I cause a lot of trouble to people. I cause trouble to my parents, I cause trouble to myself, I cause trouble for people around me, and I cause trouble to you!" Tsuna's face darkened with…was that _anger _Haru saw floating around in his eyes?

"You don't cause trouble at all! What trouble? What trouble are you making?" He demanded. Haru stammered incomprehensible things. "W-Well I always ramble and make you feel uncomfortable and-and-you know!"

"No, I don't know. So don't say stuff like that! Stuff like…I should die and…" Tsuna's voice trailed off. Haru swallowed thickly and let out a long sigh. A bold thought pushed its way into her mind.

"Then…would you miss me if I died?" Her voice came out quiet, quiet enough so other passengers wouldn't hear her. She said it quietly enough so only Tsuna could hear her. "Sure. Why not?" Haru smiled softly. He…

Tsuna-san would miss her.

Haru had picked up on one of his habits. Whenever she asked questions like that, he had a tendency of saying those three words instead of just answering with a definite yes or no. And Haru had learned enough about him these past few months to derive out his true feelings about certain things.

* * *

><p>Haru felt that she was on the brink between sanity and insanity. She <strong>heard <strong>things, she _saw _things, she experienced things she didn't want to experience. When she slept, she no longer had those peaceful hours of sleep. Now nightmares came and tortured her mind, leaving her sweaty and crying whenever she woke up at five in the morning. She heard voices, scary voices, blood lusting voices whisper to her whenever she was alone.

She saw shadows, eyes that belonged to maniacs, she saw things that scared her so much, she was scared to go into the basement now. She was scared of the dark. She was scared of noise. And Haru couldn't help but just want to curl up in a corner full of light. She just wanted peace.

She didn't want it at all.

* * *

><p>Haru swallowed thickly. She began talking, rambling even. She told Tsuna about the nightmares that haunted her, but not the voices or the things she saw. She wasn't ready to talk about that yet. It was strange, really. She was telling him about all her nightmares, but only him. She hadn't told her friends, not even her closest friends. She hadn't even told her parents about her nightmares. And she usually told her parents everything about her life.<p>

Only he would know about the nightmares that plagued her.

"And they're really scary! I've had them for about two months straight so I can't sleep pro-ahhh." She had meant to say properly, but a yawn had somehow slipped out of her mouth. "So tired," she muttered to herself drowsily while rubbing at her tired eyes. "So darn tired."

After a stop, the train was much emptier now so Tsuna proceeded to sit down. "Why don't you sit down?" He asked her. Haru swallowed. Would…would her tailbone not hurt her?

Back in the sixth grade, Haru used to take the school bus. The school bus would drop her off at a stop near her house and she would walk to her house and watch some anime and eat. But one day, a female bus driver was driving the bus, a new bus driver in fact. So as the bus pulled up in front of Haru's house, she proceeded to get out. But the bus driver moved the vehicle, the door still opened.

And Haru tumbled out, falling on the cement sitting up. Directly on her tailbone. She wailed and writhed in the ground in agony. A few of the kids who also got off at the stop stopped and helped her up and helped her limp home. And the bus driver?

She had left the minute Haru fell.

And since then, it had been very hard for Haru. She couldn't do pushups as well, as it hurt her body and her tailbone. It hurt to do sit-ups sometimes, it hurt to sit down even, it hurt to stand and walk sometimes. The doctors had told her a long time ago that her tailbone would stay permanently broken, and had also told her that a vital bone had disappeared. They even told her there was a chance that she might not be able to have kids.

So Haru was scared that if she sat, it would hurt her immensely. But she was so tired…surely...surely…surely it wouldn't hurt!

Haru sat down, slowly, cautiously. And she breathed in relief when no pain struck her. She relaxed and soon found her head tilting this way and that way. She was so tired; she just wanted to her head and stressed out heart. So somehow, she fell asleep on Tsuna's shoulder.

Not really deep sleeping. She was just resting her head on his shoulder, putting her upper weight onto his left shoulder. She was still conscious. She waited for Tsuna to freeze, she waited for him to push her away…but he didn't. So Haru happily relaxed, her breathing getting slower and slower. And eventually fell into a light sleep. A few stops before Tsuna's final destination, her eyes opened. Carefully, Haru opened one of her eyes and tilted her head so she could see Tsuna-san's face.

He was **looking **at her, an almost tender look on his face. He looked peaceful, even. And when he saw her looking, he quickly turned the other way. If Haru had the energy, she would've giggled. But she didn't. She just smiled a little smile and went back to resting on his head.

The distance between them was once again closing, it seemed.

As Tsuna was getting up, her arms reached out and closed around his neck. Not in a choke-hold. She just wanted to hug him. So she did, whispering goodbyes and thank-yous.

"Goodbye, Tsuna-san." She whispered softly. She saw a slight pink mingling with his skin color as he attempted to get up. But she didn't let him go. "What do you say back?" She asked softly, her voice carrying a playful tone.

"Bye."

"Bye, what? What's my name?"

"Bye…Haru."

Haru felt like she was on cloud nine, even after he was long gone. She still felt like she was on cloud nine when she was on the bus. Even as she proceeded to sleep, she continually heard his voice saying her name.

She had no nightmares that night.

* * *

><p>She felt more than disappointed. Haru's hand clenched and unfolded, desperately trying not to scream and cry out her anger. She had tried so hard and yet-!<p>

…Yet despite the four days worth of effort, she had still failed her math test. Haru sighed and ran a hand through a hair. She would have to shower the minute she got home; no, she would take a bath! A nice, long, bubbly bath…That did sound very nice. Haru moved a bit to the music that blasted from her headphones and shuffled her feet this way and that.

She was tired. And hungry. And so, so lonely. Tsuna was not there again; this was the tenth time! This was her tenth time waiting for the boy. Two hours had passed since she arrived at the station…So why wasn't he coming? Maybe…Maybe one day he'd learn how much he affected her whenever she saw him. Whether he was next to her, across from her, anywhere in Haru's viewing range, she just melted and lost all common sense. Maybe one day…

She swallowed. Maybe one day he'd learn how fast he made her heart skip a beat.

* * *

><p>"Rini-chan, what's this?"<p>

Haru peered at the small bottle in her hands. It looked like it was made of glass, heck, it felt like it was made of class! At the top of the tiny bottle was a cork, akin to the cork on wine bottles. And inside were three small pills, one side of the pill red, the other side white. And in the center of each pill was a small heart with an arrow going through it.

Rini, one of Haru's closest friends, puffed out her chest. "Remember what you told me about your liking-"

"SSHH! Rini-chan, not so loud! S-Someone could hear you!"

Haru remembered a few days ago when she had confessed to Rini that she in fact, liked Tsuna very much. Rini had squealed and fervently wished Haru good luck. But as the passengers in the car departed from the train to transfer to another train, Tsuna had appeared amidst the crowd!

And he had been only three feet away too…Haru remembered how frightened she had been, how incredibly scared she was at that time. After all, even when she whispered, she had an incredibly loud voice. And Tsuna had been unusually kind to her as they boarded their train together…

"I wished you good luck, didn't I? This is a good luck charm! Keep it, it might help!" Haru felt a warm bubbly feeling in her stomach. "T-This is for me?" She stammered. Rini nodded, smiling the whole while. Haru reached out for Rini and gave her a big hug.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you Rini-chan!"

Rini chuckled and patted Haru's soft, rabbit-like hair. "I'm sure everything will work out fine, since it's you after all. What person could turn you down anyways?"

* * *

><p>"Yamamoto-kun…you were right."<p>

Haru regretted confessing to Yamamoto the minute that smug look appeared on the boy's face. "So you realized that you do like him?" Yamamoto said eagerly. Haru nodded, red-faced.

"W-Was it obvious?"

Yamamoto scratched his head for a minute and then nodded. Haru cursed silently in her mind, hoping no one else noticed. And then a sudden thought bloomed in her mind, like the way a flower might bloom in spring. Maybe he had noticed her attraction to Tsuna…because he was also like her. He also liked someone very much. They were both rather pitiful; both willing to do anything, **something** for their special person. Both willing to wait three hours for that special person, even longer if they could.

"I-I'm going to confess to him one day!" She blurted out. Yamamoto nodded and winked at her. "Good luck!"

"Don't tell anyone, okay? Promise!"

"I promise! Cross my heart!"

Haru wondered when she had started addressing Yamamoto in such a friendly way. And then she smiled. She already knew the answer. They had become good friends.

* * *

><p>Haru's other close friend, Junko, had wrinkled her nose when Haru had confessed. Haru had known Junko ever since her first year in middle school, so the two were very close. "No!" Junko screeched, slapping Haru right on the head. Haru clutched at her injured head and groaned at the headache that followed from the sharp blow.<p>

"That hurt!" She screeched.

Junko stared at Haru as if she had grown three heads. "I can understand Gokudera, Yamamoto, even Cozarto! Well…no, not really. Forget Cozarto. What' so good about Tsuna? He's not even that good looking you know…"

Haru tilted her head to the side. "Really? I always thought he was kind of cute." Junk shook her head disapprovingly. "You shouldn't think like that," her friend chided. "You deserve so much better." The words echoed in Haru's head. Honestly, she thought that Tsuna deserved much better.

* * *

><p>"You know, there's a lot of girls at our school. Not too many boys…" Haru murmured to herself. Tsuna raised an eyebrow at this and Haru flushed. "I think that at least two girls like every boy," he said after a while. "If you think about it mathematically." Haru's eyes widened, for the boy across her was sporting an un-Tsunaish blush.<p>

"W-What are you trying to say? That someone at the school might like y-Gokudera-kun?"

Tsuna shrugged and smiled. "Why not?" Haru bit her lip. She had almost said _you…_ Haru relaxed as they moved on from dangerous topics like love and such.

In the back of her mind, she noted that Tsuna really wasn't as cold as she thought. Or perfect. He was kind of clumsy sometimes. But she was much, much clumsier than him. He was a little dumb in some subjects, but that was expected. Not every human in the world was perfect, after all. And once in a while, he stammered or blushed. He was opening himself up to her and Haru would gladly pour out her whole soul and body to every bit of information he revealed.

* * *

><p>"I used to have a tutor, you know. He always pushed me to the limit. I was stupider back then in middle school, dumber and unable to do anything, But then I got a tutor and he helped me get smarter. He helped me become like this. I'm not Dame-Tsuna anymore. That used to be my nickname, you know."<p>

No, Haru had not known. Not until he had revealed it to her. What had caused him to reveal this bit of history with her? Whatever the reason...Haru was glad. He had willingly given her information and she would gladly store the memories away in her mind. She would never forget. Because whatever he told her, was precious. Like a treasure.

"I used to have someone I considered an older brother. But he's gone now, I don't know where he went. He had to leave because of matters concerning his job. I wanted to be just like him, so I pushed myself to do better than him. I think I…I think I wanted to be noticed too."

Haru bit her lip, resisting the urge to go up to him and **hug **him and tell him that she had noticed him a long time ago. That he was perfect as he was. He didn't need to push himself to be better...he was fine as he was.

* * *

><p>"You like someone, don't you?"<p>

Haru jumped. Makoto was looking closely at her with a sly grin on his face. It just so happened to be that he was mutual friends with her and Yamamoto. "I-I do." She mumbled, red-faced as she stared at the tiles of the floor.

Makoto chuckled. "I know who it is." Haru's head snapped up. "You do?" She couldn't keep the alarm out of her voice, the fear that was rising in her mind. How on earth did he-

"Yamamoto told me everything. You like Tsuna, don't you?"

Haru's heart seemed to stop, and the warmth in her body seemed to freeze. Yamamoto told told-even though he had promised her-! Haru felt betrayal for the first time. She would have to talk to him later…But she couldn't lie…She would not be ashamed of the fact that she liked him! "I-I do." Makoto sighed.

"Out of all guys, why him? I mean, why Tsuna? You could do so much better."

Haru frowned. What was that supposed to mean? Tsuna-san was amazing, in her opinion. He was perfect to her, and that was all that mattered. "I-I kind of always thought that I was out of his league," she muttered. "He deserves better."

Makoto looked at her as if she was crazy. "Are you kidding? Why-Why the hell would you think like that?" Haru looked away, avoiding his eyes. "Because…he's smart." She said lamely. And then Haru leaned forward, fire burning in her eyes. "You can't tell anyone, okay? Promise!"

A trustworthy smile. Playful-looking eyes.

"I promise."

"Pinky-promise?"

"Of course."

* * *

><p>"Yamamoto-kun!"<p>

Yamamoto turned around, alarmed. "H-Haru! What's wrong with you?" Haru's face reddened with anger. "You told!" She yelled at him angrily. Haru felt betrayed, hurt even.

"Huh?"

"Makoto-san told me that you told him that I like…Tsuna-san."

Yamamoto frowned. "I didn't, Haru. I swear. Honest. I never said a word to him." Haru was still suspicious even after she strode away. The honesty in Yamamoto's eyes told her that he hadn't. But Makoto had told her that Yamamoto had spilled on Haru's secret.

…Just who was lying?

* * *

><p>Haru was very much surprised when Junko grabbed her and led her to a solitary corner in the school library. "What's wrong, Junko-chan? Did something happ-"<p>

"He knows. Tsuna knows."

Haru's tired body became awake, her mind alert. Adrenaline flowed in her blood. "W-What are you saying?" She whispered. Junko frowned, taking a look around her to make sure no one could possibly hear.

"I overheard Makoto telling Tsuna in class that you liked him. He said, 'You know, Haru really likes you a lot.' I'm not lying. Yamamoto was there too, he looked worried when Makoto said that." Haru's jaw dropped. "Then…Then Yamamoto-kun didn't say anything?"

"Eh? No. He never mentioned such a thing. Why, you told him?"

Haru nodded. She had, but that wasn't important. "W-What did Tsuna-san say?" Her heart and mind felt like it was on the edge of a cliff, as if she were teetering and tottering off a cliff edge. "He didn't say anything." Junko said darkly.

Haru's heart fell. She knew Tsuna very well; five months of analyzing and studying his every action enabled her to read his mind very well. She…without even confessing, had been rejected.

* * *

><p>"Makoto!"<p>

The boy whirled around and looked very much frightened when he saw her angry face. There was a time when a kid had insulted Haru on a daily basis. After a week, Haru had broken down. And at the minute she had shed tears, she had grabbed the boy by the collar, and punched him until he swore never to do such a thing again. It seemed that indeed, history repeated itself.

"How dare you!" She screeched. Her fist opened and clenched itself again. "How dare you…" she breathed warning, her hand lashed out and took the boy by the collar and slammed him against the hard wall. "How could you?" She screamed. "Was this a joke to you? Were my feelings a joke? Something to laugh about it? Tell me!"

The boy nodded and Haru felt an unknown monster, a sleeping demon awaken within her.

Her hand gripped his shirt till she was choking him, resisting the urge to punch him with her other first. "Promise me you'll never do such a thing again!" She snarled. Makoto, who had always been always cool and confident, seemed to lose his composure at this very moment.

He nodded. "If you ever do such a thing again, I'll take a knife and carve every single part of you out till you can't reproduce ever again," she threatened. "Got it?"

The boy nodded and she let him go. As he scampered off, she saw **him **in Makoto's direction. Standing there. Unmoving. He had been just standing there the whole time, watching. Not lifting a single finger. Nothing. Haru felt tears spring in her eyes. She never felt such blood lust run through her veins before. She had never felt such disappointment in her life before. She had never felt this angry before.

One of Makoto's friends ran up to her with bright eyes. "Oh my gosh! That was so scary but so cool! You should be a bodyguard! Hey, you want to be my bodyguard?" Haru managed to regain her composure and smiled nervously.

"You think so?"

* * *

><p>Oh, things had never been so awkward for Haru before.<p>

She and Tsuna were waiting in silence for the coming train. She had attempted to talk to him, attempted to act as if nothing had ever happened…She had thought, hoped even that they could pretend nothing had ever happened, and thus go back into their usual routine...talking with each other, laughing...

But he didn't reply at all.

After what seemed like eternity, their train finally arrived. But it was much too crowded; Haru wouldn't last five seconds in such an overcrowded train. So she backed away. She expected Tsuna to wait with her, as he always had whenever an overcrowded train arrived…

But he got on the train, leaving her behind.

She saw him turn behind once, and she waved before pretending to look down at her mp3 player. She knew it. She…She had been rejected. Goodbye to those days, where she was able to look at him and laugh. Goodbye to those days, where she was able to see his smiling face. Goodbye to those days, where she was able to hug him and take in his warmth, his body heat.

When she rode the next train, tears left wet trails on her cheeks. As she blankly stared into open space, she noticed that the passengers looked at her at first with alarm, and then pity. They stared at her for a little while before looking away, stealing glances at her as she cried silently.

Haru supposed she had seen this coming. She had wanted to build up on her friendship with Tsuna a little bit longer, to confirm if she really wanted to confess to him. And then at the end of the year, she would confess to him. But…Makoto had ruined everything. She had ruined everything. She should have never let Makoto trick her!

Tsuna no longer looked at her. He shied away from her.

* * *

><p>When she was walking home, it was already eight in the evening. The sun was long gone, not a single cloud in sight. Just the black inky sky with a few satellites and red lights from planes blinking once in a while. The cold bit at Haru's wet cheeks, it made her shiver at the bitter wind that whipped at her hair.<p>

As she walked on with slow steps, the music seemed to get louder and louder even though Haru wasn't doing anything to the volume. And then she collapsed on the ground, bent as if she were praying. Hands flat on the cement, bruised knees holding up her body, bag thrown to the side from her sudden movement. Tsuna no longer would look at her, he'd no longer talk to her…

He would act as if she was no longer there.

She didn't want that-

_Tsuna-san.._

She didn't ask for that-

**She honestly..**

_**Didn't want that.**_

Before she knew it, a scream ripped apart from Haru's lips as she screamed desperately. Her screams reduced to cries, her breath coming out in shaky staccatos as tears flowed out at an alarming pace. Her hands gripped her shoulders as she keeled over, sobbing loudly. She could no longer breathe through her nose; her mouth opened mechanically to take in great gulps of air.

"I didn't ask for this!" She screamed at the sky. "I-I didn't…ah…I never wanted this! I just…I just wanted him to accept me! I just wanted him to look at me smile-Kami-sama! Was it too much of me to ask? Was I being selfish? Tell me!"

Thirty minutes later, she fell onto her side, still crying. Incomprehensible, distorted words spilled from her mouth. If someone had been looking on this scene, they would've realized that the name 'Tsuna-san' was the only comprehensible thing the girl managed to say. She fainted, her body and mind unable to process the fact that the person she had learned to love during those five months would no longer even look at her.

Forty minutes later, a stranger saw a young girl unconscious, collapsed on the ground and hurried to help her. With the kind man's help, Haru was able to reach her home into the arms of her worried parents.

Even now…Even now as she desperately tried to sleep, the salty clear liquid was still tracking across her face, her blanket, her hands…her very being. Her last thoughts as she slept...was a regretful message. Regretful that even though she had desperately, willingly given out her heart to this one boy...it had never been accepted. Had it not been enough? Was it because her affection for this boy was simply not enough?

She had never felt so tormented her whole life.

* * *

><p><strong>Owari.<strong>

**Based off the events happening to me.**

**I hope you enjoyed this humble little fanfiction that I offer to all of you 2786 readers. **


	2. Chapter 2

エピローグ

Katekyo Hitman Reborn! Fanfic

Pairing: 2786 (TsunaHaru)

Description: They rode the train every day, just him and her. She should've seen it coming. AU

Shout out to LadyDream3512: I totally wasn't thinking about writing an epilogue. BUT YOU IMPLANTED THE IDEA INTO MY MIND. Sorry it took such a long time. This apology is to you and the readers. The reason the epilogue exists is because of you!

note: LadyDream3512. Yup. A whole lot of awesome. You readers and reviewers. Are love. TsunaHaru. Forever. It exists. Now please proceed reading.

* * *

><p>When Haru woke up in the morning, she felt dead exhausted. She rubbed at her tired, bleary eyes. What time was it? Her eyes automatically flicked towards the direction of the clock hanging on the wall. The reaction was immediate; the blanket was kicked off to the side, the light-switch was smacked on and she was running towards the bathroom as fast as she could. She was going to be late; she was going to be late, late, late for schoo-<p>

The realization came over her and the impact hit her like the way she had fallen off the bus. It hurt and felt like she was being torn apart. The events of yesterday washed over her and she felt broken. Mentally. Physically. And then the emotions crashed into her mind, like the way chaotic waves reached the shore at the many beaches she had been to. Humiliation. Anger. Self-pity. Embarrassment. Heartbroken. So this was what a one-sided regret was like.

She had always heard from fellow female friends about their painful experiences, how they had given their all to a boy that charmed them profusely and it turned out…

That boy wouldn't return their feelings.

She'd been in love before. She had. But it hadn't been a one sided crush. It hadn't been a crush. It had been-Her mind grappled with the thought and forcefully buried it away.

She would always sympathize and reach out to those friends, but never quite understood them. She had always wondered why those girls made such a big deal when it was so obvious that there tons of other boys in the world. Much better males. She had assumed that the love they talked about was nothing but a crush, something trivial that would be forgotten about in due time.

Oh how wrong she had been.

She had always seen it in the movies, dramas, television shows. Most romantic novels or manga she picked up would mention it here and there. And she never quite understood it. Because she had never been in a one-sided love before. And then her mind was wandering to that time and she forcibly shut the memory away. Never again. She would never remember that horrible time again…Not when she had _this _to deal with.

How was she going to go to school? She'd see Tsuna for sure. She'd see his friends. And by now, Makoto had probably told a good amount of people already…How was she going to face the humiliation? How was she going to face him? How-How was she- She inhaled sharply and shook her head.

No, she had to get ready for school first. Then she could freak out and worry about how to deal with the situation.

* * *

><p>When she entered the train station, Junko was waiting for her; sipping away at the tea she drank every morning. Haru tightened her fists. She would not cry, she would not cry. She would not look at Junko in the face. If she did, then she would surely cry. So she focused on the plastic bottle in Junko's grasp. It looked crinkled and squashed at the areas where Junko had applied more force with her hand.<p>

_It looked exactly the way she felt. _

And she cried. She cried and cried till she was sure the taste of salt would never leave her taste buds again. "Oh Haru," Junko murmured as she pulled the bawling girl into a hug. "You stupid, loveable girl." Haru sniffled, trying to dim down the volume of her cries. People around the two were casting strange looks at Haru and the girl felt like she wanted to crawl into a hole and stay there for a long time. She hadn't even gotten to school yet. And already, people were staring.

It occurred to Haru that she was the type that really cried when she shed tears. There were the elegant girls that silently shed tears without a blotch or sign of swollen eyes to mar their pretty looks. There were the stoic ones that did not shed physical tears, but rather cried inside. There were the over-emotional ones that went into hysterics when they cried. And then there were people like her. The ungraceful ones with the red, blotchy faces and swollen eyes while using their voices as a source of release for their broken souls.

To Haru, her voice sounded like she was choking and hiccupping at the same time. And it did not sound appealing at all; it didn't sound like the way the beautiful actresses sounded whenever they cried when they were acting. Haru nearly laughed a bitter laugh. How could she think about something so trivial at a time like this?

_Because my mind was made like this, _she thought to herself. _To never be normal. That's me. _

"Come on, let's go," Junko urged. "We should go. The train's coming. C'mon. Wipe your tears away. There you go, that's a good girl-_Haru!" _The girl's face was mixed with exasperation and pity. "Don't you start crying again!"

Haru wiped at her tears again, smiling a little bit as she did so. "Heehee. Sorry." Junko shook her head reproachfully. "You really…You like Tsuna. That's impossible. Why do you always have to love people so easily? Don't you remember-"

Haru froze and stared at Junko with hollow eyes. "Don't talk about it," she hissed angrily. "It never happened. It never happened, alright?" Junko pursed her lips. "Alright, Haru. Calm down. C'mon, let's go already. People are staring, you know."

**Let them stare, **Haru thought to herself silently. **People are always looking at you, what does it matter? Let them look. People do it all the time. That's how they judge others. **

* * *

><p>She remembered all the times she'd sent him texts.<p>

And every time, he'd usually never answer. And on those rare occasions that he did, they'd be short. Brief. Rare.

She was really very sensitive about things like this, she realized. She was a person who texted as if she were talking. Every time she texted, there'd be an miniscule explosion of emoticon happiness. If she was very happy…there'd be a whole explosion of emoticons. Haru was the type of person who preferred long texts with emoticons.

It really was unfair.

Every single time he did reply, her heart would split in two. She'd be happy that he'd reply…But she'd want to scream at him.

Why won't you reply more? Why won't you say anything else besides that?

Every time he brought her a little piece of happiness…He was really in fact killing her too.

* * *

><p>Haru bit her lip, frantic. He was sure to be inside the library with the others…She couldn't go into there! Well, she didn't really have a choice. She couldn't go down to the cafeteria. She couldn't. Not that place. She felt too lonely there. She swallowed and strode in, swiping her ID card as she did so. Before, she would practically skip into the library as if she were going to a meadow full of daisies and sunshine. Now she felt like she was in a morgue.<p>

Haru squared her shoulders before entering the computer section of the library, heart pounding at the sight of her friends and…him. He didn't look nervous or tense. He looked fine. Absolutely _fine. _Why was that? Ah…

That was right. He didn't like her that way.

Mustering all the emotional strength that her mind contained, she walked into the room, trying to plaster on her usual smile. Makoto flashed his mischievous smile at her and inside her mind, Haru sighed. It was always like this. Why couldn't she ever stay mad at someone? Why did she always forgive those who hurt her? Why couldn't her anger hold just this once? Every single time, she'd forgive them.

_Hajime._

And she blinked once, twice, was in front of her, regarding her with a little smile. Her mouth opened in surprise, her eyes giving him a smile of their own. Makoto regarded the two with a cocky smile before turning to talk to Junko. And then Haru frowned. Why was Tsuna smiling at her? He never smiled without a reason.

Could it be…?

Her fists tightened and the expression on her face soured before striding away. She planted herself in a chair and pulled out a notebook out of her bag. Studying the notebook for a brief moment, she opened a new document and typed away. Her fingers moved rapidly across the keyboard until she could only hear the keys moving vigorously.

"Calm down, Haru. It's like you're going to die any moment at the rate you're typing."

Makoto's voice entered her hearing and she regarded him with a roll of her eyes and a brief smile before turning back to her work. Focus, she told herself. **Focus. Don't think about it.**

To be honest, she was surprised. It wasn't the way…she had imagined. Tsuna had not shunned her; he had showed her a smile. It was as if nothing had happened. The only thing that had changed was the atmosphere. She felt shyer, she felt more timid than she had before. And he looked at her the same, but there was a sort of light that showed in his eyes.

She wasn't imagining it. She had looked into those eyes many times and not once had she ever seen that light. Not till now.

And then her hand curled into a fist and struck down the table. The other students shot indignant looks at her before going back to what they were doing. Haru could feel the gazes of her friends burning into her back.

"What the heck, Haru?" Makoto demanded. Junko regarded her friend's back with a guarded stare before sighing, shaking her head. Haru, who usually was very easy to read wasn't so easy to analyze this time. Haru was an emotional person; she wore her heart on her sleeve. Junko rolled back her sleeves and shook her head.

_That idiot. _

No one realized that a full-scale war was commencing in Haru's mind. No one realized that her mind had split in two; no one realized that she was fighting with herself. It was her own war.

_Isn't this what you asked for? Didn't you say that you wanted him to smile at you? Aren't you happy? Aren't you glad? You're happy and you know it. He's smiling at you; his eyes are so gentle now, Haru! He might even-_

**Haru, get a hold of yourself! Why is he smiling? He's never smiled like that before! He never did that before, never showed you that tenderness before. Maybe it's because of Makoto…Maybe because Tsuna knows of your feelings now-Maybe he's started to like you back! And that's unacceptable.**

"Unacceptable," she whispered to herself. "So unacceptable." If Tsuna was opening his heart just because he knew that she liked him…

_Unforgiveable. _

* * *

><p>"Tsuna-san," she said with a hint of surprise in her voice. "When'd you get here?" He looked at her curiously and stared for a moment. "I just came now." Haru's eyes bulged. "You mean you were on that train that just came now?" She asked him. He nodded again, his eyebrows furrowing as he looked at her. "Really? I did too! But I didn't see you on it," she told him. "But I see you now."<p>

_Liar. _

Her mind hissed the word at her, her heart recoiled in disgust. **Liar, **it whispered. And liar she was. She had seen him. She had just pretended to not see him. She recalled doing this before, numerous times. She just really hadn't wanted to talk to him. It just hurt to look at him, it hurt to hear him, it hurt to even think of him.

Haru had always thought of herself as a strong person. She had thought that she could deal with any pain thrown at her and toss it back like it was nothing.

But she really wasn't.

Humans like to think that, Haru thought to herself while digging out her mp3 player. We like to think that we're strong. But we're not. We're just really weak, aren't we? But we try to hide that.

**Liar.**

The two boarded the train and Haru squirmed at the awkward silence. As soon as the train stopped at the next stop, she immediately got off. But not before she fed Tsuna with the excuse that she had to board another train to go to a different destination.

_**Liar.**_

* * *

><p>Haru tried skipping a little bit to relieve her tired aching feet. It didn't help. And then her heart skipped a beat and her feet refused to move. Tsuna was at the end of the corridor near a vending machine while Makoto seemed to be enthusiastically egging him on about something. Haru's mind whirled. Why was he here? Why were Tsuna and Makoto on the third floor?<p>

They didn't need to come to the third floor; they had never come here before. Because their lockers were located on the sixth and seventh floors. Haru sighed. Surely…surely they had come here for a reason. But what?

Was she just over thinking it?

_No. _

Her mind drifted to the most absurd of thoughts and she shook her head fiercely. _There's no way that he came for me. No way._

It seemed like it was time to lie again. She grabbed her mp3 player and took it out, jamming the device into her palm while she carefully placed the headphones onto her ears. Looking around to make sure no teachers were around, she strode towards their direction, all the while looking down at the electronic device.

She went by unnoticed.

* * *

><p>It hurt.<p>

It hurt. It felt like someone was driving a knife into her heart. Why wouldn't they stop? Why wouldn't he just stop?

Why did he have to act so nice now?

Haru rested her chin on two laced hands, a brooding look on her face. It was so confusing. It was undeniable; that warmth he was showing all of a sudden.

Two weeks had passed since that awkward, embarrassing event.

* * *

><p>"I'm not going to like anyone till I turn eighteen or nineteen. I'm not going to date till then."<p>

Haru's head tilted, eyes fixed on the boy sitting next to her. "Why?" She asked, making sure her voice didn't sound too curious.

It was a wasted effort. She always sounded curious around him.

"Because," he said in an obvious tone. "My grades would get worse. And…dating in my opinion is really nothing."

She nodded, beaming when honestly inside she wondered why he had told her this again when she'd already known this two months ago.

* * *

><p>Her eyes lit up in delight as she took a picture of the remnants of the drink she'd taken. Carrot juice. It had helped her a lot. The nutrition of the vegetable had flowed into her body. Her eyes felt stronger, they felt refreshed. She whispered a silent thank you to her father who'd taken the time to make it for her.<p>

Without knowing it, her fingers tapped in Tsuna's number before sending the picture to him. Moments later, he replied.

'Haru, what the heck is that?'

A smile.

'Carrot juice. Doesn't it look interesting? :D'

'It looks like throw up. ._.'

'Puh-lease. I'll make it for you, you know xD It'll taste really good~ You should try it one day, you know? :]'

'No, I don't know. It looks disgusting.'

It _did _look disgusting.

'Your face is disgusting. Just kidding! Ahaha…Gotta go Tsuna-san. Talk to you later!'

When she picked up her phone again, she promptly dropped it in shock. Tsuna-san had texted her back. With more than one word. That was the most he'd ever texted her! He had even added a face emoticon! Sheer happiness.

It was running through her brain, her veins; her cells. Everywhere.

* * *

><p>"It'd be nice." She said suddenly.<p>

He looked at her. "What would be nice?" Haru smiled. It was a sincere smile. "Like…Tsuna-san…mmm..Say you could take the whole world's misery away. Say you could take away everyone's sadness and frustration and anger and place it into yourself. The rest of the world would be happy. It'd be only you suffering. Would you do it?"

He sighed. "What got this idea into your head, Haru?" Haru flushed and shrugged. "I don't know…It just came onto my mind like that," she said, snapping her fingers for emphasis. "But answer the question. Would you?"

He snorted and shook his head reproachfully at her. "Stop thinking about things like that, Haru. But I don't think you'd do it."

"Again you're not answering the question," she muttered under her breath. "Well, I would. I'd do it in a heartbeat. The only problem is that I'm too scared to do it."

"Scared? Of what?"

" I'm scared of suffering."

* * *

><p>It seemed like everyone had forgotten about the fact that she liked him.<p>

"Hey, Haru. Is it true that you like Tsuna?"

Haru froze. "What do you mean…?" She asked, forcing her voice to sound steady. Inside, her mind was thrown into chaos.

_Not this again, please not again. Things are finally turning back to normal-don't ask me, don't ask me__**, **_**don't ask me!**

Daisuke was a close friend of Makoto. He only talked to Haru if he needed help with studying, if he needed to copy her HW…

"Is it true that you like Tsuna? Like…do you like him that way?"

Haru flushed in embarrassment and laughed. "Sorry to disappoint you, but I used to like him. Not anymore." Ah, the lie was slipping out of her mouth much easier now. Daisuke chuckled and strode away. Haru frowned. What had that been about? "DAISUKE, WAIT A MINUTE!"

He halted and looked at her as if to say, what gives? "Sorry to take up your time," she said quickly. "But who told you that I liked Tsuna-san?"

"Makoto did of course. Didn't you know? You know Jasmine, the foreign exchange student in your class, right?" Haru nodded. "She knows too, you know. And so does Aoi and Rika and Yamamoto and Gokudera…Sasagawa too. Both of 'em."

Haru nodded slowly. "Oh, I see. Thanks, Daisuke." He nodded, striding away at a faster pace. Haru closed her eyes and forced her mind to relax with all the might she had. There was no point getting upset about it. After all…

Apparently now she didn't like him anymore.

* * *

><p>Frustration ran through every cell of her body.<p>

Why was it always like this? Why couldn't she stop them? Why couldn't they stop? Why couldn't they stop using her? She wasn't a tool-she was human too! It hurt when they ignored her and it hurt when they only talked to her when they needed her for something.

It's always like this, she thought bitterly. Always like this.

Why couldn't she say no to the requests people asked of her? _'Haru, can I have your food?' 'Haru, can I copy your homework?' 'Hey Haru, tell the teacher I was absent today if they ask!' _

She was sick of it and yet…she didn't have the nerve or the courage to tell them no. At this rate, she'd be nothing but a machine. A machine that could feel. But a machine that heeded the people that commanded her.

* * *

><p>She was angry. She was upset. She was so hurt beyond words.<p>

She tightened her hands into fists, trying to block out the sounds of her teacher screaming at her. _I can't hear you, I can't hear you_, her mind whispered.

So why could she still hear?

_Disgrace. Inexcusable disgrace of a musician. It's so easy…Why can't you do it? Why can't you do it? It's so simple; it's not that hard._

Haru felt like crying. She knew was a miserable excuse of a musician. She couldn't sight read. It was so difficult for her and no one had ever properly taught her. And now she was getting yelled at because of it…

_Just quit music! I don't know how you got into a school focused on the arts!_

To be honest, Haru didn't really know either. Her school was considered one of the top-notched high schools, except it was well-known for the students' talents in the arts instead of education like the other schools. To quote her principal's words… 'Only the best, talented artists get in.'

Talented? Her? She could just laugh.

Oh no, the tears were coming…She had to think of something…Or else she'd cry in front of her teacher. She refused to cry in front of her piano teacher. That was a sign of weakness. She couldn't. She **wouldn't.**

So why was everything getting so blurry?

Immediately, a memory came to her. Tsuna-san's face. The first time he'd look at her with warmth. His voice. _'You're crying? At this age? Cheer up already.'_ The first time his voice sounded so light-hearted. She'd been crying because she had failed her test she had tried so hard for. And with those words, he'd comforted her.

Even now, those words were comforting her…Haru's eyes widened in realization. And then her mind sighed and her heart pounded reproachfully at her.

She liked him that much.

* * *

><p>Haru frowned. Her mind was working overtime; the cogs in her head were revolving at a faster pace. What had happened? She sat down with a brooding look on her face. Before, she had joined a club just so she could see Tsuna-san. She'd hoped that she'd see him at the school. But she never had. But over time, she had resolved to go to club for a different reason.<p>

She had wanted to go to club for the sake of hanging with her new friends. Spending time with them, laughing with them, dancing with them…It meant everything to her. And now a line of separation was between them. There were two factions in the group now. One led by Akane, the club leader and best dancer out of all them. The other…Haru pondered at this. Who was the leader? Riki-chan, who'd always been so close to her, had been snatched away by Akane. Haru's lip quivered. She hadn't noticed this.

No, that was a lie.

She knew. She had noticed. She'd seen. But she had just prayed for it to not happen. It all had started with Akane acting coldly to her. And gradually…Haru buried her head in her arms. She was tired. It hurt to think about it.

She wasn't on Akane's faction. That's all she knew.

* * *

><p>Why were all her friends getting so far away? Haru's bottom lip worked itself into a pout. Everyone seemed to be so far away…so distant. It was always like this. She'd have tons of friends and over the year, she'd lose most of them.<p>

Her fists balled.

It wasn't fair. She wanted to keep all of her friends. She wanted to keep them close to her. Because she wasn't any good alone.

Darn it, she was really no good when she was all by herself.

* * *

><p>Through her tears, she could make out her friends looking at her. The text on her phone blurred until it seemed like all the words were jumbled together.<p>

Why was he texting her? Why, why, why?

He hadn't talked to her for at least a year and a half. Why was he sending a text to her now? Haru bit her lip hard, until it seemed like it was going to bleed.

_Stay away. You're creepy, you disgusting thing. I don't need you anymore. _

"Um…Haru? Why are you crying?" Makoto asked hesitantly. She laughed bitterly, smiling as she did so. Makoto edged away. He'd never seen her like this before. "Why is he doing this now?" She muttered to herself. "Who is it?" He asked curiously. Wordlessly, Haru held the phone up to his face so he could read the screen. Immediately, Makoto's face creased and her other friends crowded around to read the message. "Who'd say such a thing?" _Clatter clatter. _Haru looked up and saw Junko striding down the stairs.

"Haru, what's wrong now? Did he do something again?"

Haru flinched when Junko flashed a glare at Tsuna who held up his hands defensively. "I didn't do anything!" He protested. "He really didn't," Haru said quietly. "But Hajime-he…"

Junko's eyes hardened. "I thought you said you weren't going to talk about him anymore…? Or…did something happen?" Haru swallowed and showed her the text. Junko's face grew livid with anger and a torrent of curses flowed from her mouth. "That little-what's he doing, talking to you?"

Haru shrugged, shaking her head in confusion. "I don't know. I-We haven't talked since-" Makoto stepped in between them. "Um…who's Hajime?" Haru froze up and tried to speak, but nothing came out. No words-only those horrible choking sounds. "He's Haru's first boyfriend. Her ex." Junko muttered.

Immediately, Haru's systems shut down. _Block it all out, block it out. _Junko's lips moved and Haru read them. _Do you want me to tell them? _Haru shrugged, looking away. "Do whatever you want." She mumbled.

"That son of a-Gah. Anyways, he pretty much used Haru here. And he ended it, that sick kid. After everything he made her do. Honestly, if I could turn back time, I'd make that sure that Haru would be the one to end it. She should've. You should've, Haru." Haru sniffled. Why could she still hear Junko's voice? It was just making her remember everything.

His demands to see her body. His demands for her to do his homework. The way he'd broken up with her over text. The way they never talked while they dated. How hard it'd been for her to get over him.

The images were overflowing now.

Tears dripping in the moonlight, a fetal position…Her hand clasping a bottle of pills. Her being rushed to the emergency room…The way she'd gotten an addiction to ramen and couldn't stop to get over her pain. It still hurt to think about it.

Haru's hand tapped out a rhythm on her thigh. She always did that whenever she was nervous. She had thought that the open wound on her heart would've closed up by now. And it had. She hadn't even thought of the chance that a scar that would've been left behind. Hajime had ended it…So why had he sent her the text? Through her blurry vision, she could see Tsuna looking at her with a blank expression on his face.

* * *

><p>"He likes you, did you know that?"<p>

Haru's eyes bulged and she inhaled in the water in the mouth. For a long minute, she choked and coughed; desperately trying to get the water out of her nose. Makoto watched her in amusement as she flailed her arms around. "Say that again?" She asked in a hoarse voice. "Because I think I misheard you." Makoto poked her forehead.

"Didn't you just hear me? Tsuna-he likes you."

From the way Makoto's eyebrows were arched, Haru could tell that he meant to say that Tsuna liked her…that way. Hope beat in Haru's chest and she crushed it down. It'd been only two weeks. There was no way he liked her.

"Don't lie to me anymore," Haru growled. "Don't lie to me anymore. I don't like it." Makoto shook his head, his eyes wide. "No, I'm really serious this time. He likes you." Haru scoffed; something she wasn't used to doing.

Usually it was other people scoffing at her.

"If you lie to me one more time, then I'll shove my pencil case down your throat." She threatened, even holding up her pencil case for emphasis to show how serious she was. Makoto gulped. From the way his face expression was contorting…He was probably remembering the last time she'd gotten angry. Haru sighed when Makoto turned away.

She didn't need false hopes anymore.

* * *

><p>Haru brushed a hand through her hair as she leaned against the door. She liked talking to Tsuna-san. She really did. But it hurt too. She had enough.<p>

She had enough. A small bitter smile appeared on her face. "Bye bye." She whispered.

* * *

><p>When she saw him, Haru acted the way she always did. And her heart still clenched painfully, but not so much. Not as much. She was sad, but she was also relieved. She was getting over him. She was getting over <strong>him. <strong>

Junko had patted her head gently when Haru had told her about her decision. "Next time it'll be better," Junko had whispered encouragingly. "It'll be better."

Haru hummed a broken melody as she pulled out her books. _That's right, it'll be better…_She thought this to herself as she pulled out her textbooks to study. She really couldn't see herself with Tsuna-san. It was a shame that she was pulling away when she'd put in so much effort…

But that was okay. Next time, she'd be wiser. Next time, she wouldn't suffer so much. And as the music flowed out from the speakers, she absent-mindedly traced out a few words onto the cover of her Japanese textbook.

First.

Love.

Regret.

* * *

><p>Bitter. Bitter. Herbs are bitter. Well, this is the epilogue! For all you people out there who've dated and gotten hurt and for all you people who've gotten hurt over a crush, know this:<p>

There is someone wonderful waiting for you. And that's really true. I think. I don't know if this epilogue is alright with you guys; but in the story, there a lot of moments from my life weaved into this. I don't know. This is rather angsty, isn't it? I was hoping that this story would've had a sweet, happy ending but in the end, I chose not to. Why?

As much as I love TsunaHaru, as much as I want to always give them fairy tale endings, I wanted to show that not all love stories will end up sweet and happy like sugar. There might be a chance that in the future, a happy ending might not happen for Haru concerning Tsuna. By the way, I'm not sure if this is just me, but Haru's life didn't seem to revolve as much around Tsuna in this one as it did in the last chapter. Has he impacted her life a lot? HECK YEAH. Is he still? I have no idea…Which is strange. Cause I'm the writer. (Insert face palm.) I tried to insert in other aspects of Haru's life that just didn't concern Tsuna. Have you guys noticed it…?

BTW. MOST RECENT KHR CHAPTERS. GO CHROME YEAH. A little 6996 there, no? Part of me wonders what's going to happen next when the rest of the me is screaming for Amano Akira-sama to put in some 2786. If only it'd happen...

Ah, before I forget, the title means Epilogue in Japanese. It's written in Katakana xD Boy am I glad I'm taking Japanese classes at school! I'll be back again…with more stories to share. I hope you'll be looking forward to it~


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